Who are you God? I guess I thought you were the God who created people with a calling. An assignment. A task.

I thought your relationship with me was like professor-student, master-servant, boss-employee. I wouldn’t have said I thought that. But I guess I thought it in my heart. Even though in my head I knew that we were supposed to be daddy-daughter, lover-beloved, dweller-dwelling place.

I guess I thought that since you created me with certain giftings and brought my life into a certain purpose, you had an expectation on my life. I guess I had an expectation on my life. And other people did too.

You enabled me to do things that you don’t enable everyone to do. People spoke it over me over and over again. You have a call on your life to be sent out. I thought I’m like a spring. Compress it in one place and it will have to be sprung out.  The tension never ceases. The tension to be released, to be sent out, to go. I knew it was true. It was in my heart to do.

To do. There is reality in that. We have an assignment to do. We have it in our hearts to do. We come alive when we do. We end up dead if we never do.

But there is a higher reality than doing. It’s being. You didn’t make me to do. You made me to be.

To be with you. That’s all I have to do.

But somehow I thought to do would cause me to be. With you. When really I had it backwards. So I set out to do my task. They all said I was sent. I knew I was sent. So they sent me out and I went. I prepared myself for a journey, leaving everything behind. I left my house. I left my town. I left my friends. And I went. Your calling was in my head. Deny yourself. Take up your cross. Come after me. And I said Goodbye officially.

I went but it wasn’t easy. Confusion settled in. Peace moved out. There in the heartache, the strangeness, the sense of poverty, I ran to your feet. To be. Finally.

And you spoke to me loud. You said, “You’re called, but you’re too young to forsake all.” You offended me. I remembered what you said about what it means to follow you. It means to forsake all. I remembered what you were doing throughout the world with youth. No one is too young for your call.

Then you showed me me. I was surprised to see me. A whitewashed tomb. Exterior shining beautifully, giving off the perception: Extraordinary. But interior full of rotting bones. Dead. Decaying.

Lauren, I care about your heart more than your calling.

Okay. I will stay. I won’t go traveling across the nation. I won’t go to new places. I will stay. I looked in your eyes and you loved me anyway.

That’s when it hit me. My God loves me. Even if all I ever do is be.

That’s when it hit me. I’m accepted not because of what I do. Jesus did it in my place. This is what we call grace. God thinks I’m awesome when I’m just sitting there.

I sat there looking at you refusing to do. Because all I wanted now was to be with you. God who are you?

Only once in your Word do you tell us to strive. You say, “Strive to enter my Rest.” You are the God who ended your doing with resting. Not because you needed it. But because it’s who you are. You were. You are. You are to come. You fulfill the verb To Be.

You made people in your own image. You made us like you. You made us to be. To be partners with you in your being. Oh God, now I know with all my heart, I was made for you. I was made to be with you. I love you God. I love you. I don’t know anybody else like you. You love me so real.

“Be in me, and I in you, and you will bear much fruit.”

If I don’t stay here with you, I will accomplish nothing.

“Be in my love.”

In your love I will be.

"What's the next play coach, I can't hear the call?"

"The crowd's interferring, should we stop ball?"

"Call a timeout." There's too many voices;

"Come get refreshed to prevent foolish choices."

The coach calls timeout; We sprint off the court.

He's the real reason our team plays the sport.

Coach gives a word; we go back to battle;

"Here's the play guys, now round 'em like cattle."

Call to the Coach and He will respond.

No team succeeds if Coach Jesus isn't heard.

His voice and His presence refreshen us.

Play like Him.

Jesus is a ballplayer who played a game and gave us a gameplan so we can win. His precious Word. Follow the fresh Gameplan collectively

Just felt the Lord wanting me to share. This is never easy for me cause i don't think i'm the best and most eloquent writer. :P I just want to encourage all those who need encouragement!! Anyone who thinks your faith is being tested and feel like what you think, believe and know is being stretch to the utmost. When you know something is possible seems so impossible right now. Or feel you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel... I just want to say there is EXCITING things happening all around us.

I have been learning to see what the Lord is doing around me and not just focus on my situation or circumstances. This will take the focus off of "me, me, me" and onto the Lord... When I loose site of what I know is true, when I allow the Devil and the world to whisper things in my ear, I begin to question the very thing that led me there/where ever to begin with. And that thing is my Faith in God and His leading in my life... I think I make the enemies job so much easier when I just begin to listen to the lies, let the lies scare me,allow doubt to set in, or try to rationalize or control what i don't have control over or beat myself up over something that i just need to let go and move on..

I need to remember the small things matter in the big picture. Over the last few years the Lord has shown me that I am just a small part in the big picture, especially in someone's life. So be faithful in the little things God has entrusted you to do. What you do in someone's life can impact it for the rest of their lives and you may not even know it.. it can just be a listening ear, buying someone a cup of coffee, a home cooked meal or it can be leading someone to the Lord, healing them or mentoring them.. Each has its significance. Each is important.

I need to remember to constantly exercise my faith!I remember one of my great friends use to just step in puddles. When i first asked her what she was doing. She would reply " Just seeing if today is the day I am going to walk on water. You never know. Don't want to miss out when it does happen." This example of my friend's faith has stuck with me since then. It just reminds me that I need faith to do the things that God is calling me to do.. Some things may seem impossible but we just need to step out in faith to do what the Lord is telling us to do or know that God can do. If it doesn't happen the way we think it's ok keep going. It doesn't mean God is not with us, doesn't mean we didn't do something "right". It's all about exercising our faith...

I need to remember who the Lord is and what He can and will do!!! God is a God who has many promises for me and you. God has great things in stored for each of our lives. God is doing amazing things on the college campuses. It's amazing how God is stirring the campuses of america.. Many people are getting saved, healed and being touched by the Holy Spirit.. These are the great things God is, will and can do where ever you are (campus, job, family, with strangers).

i need to remember God is with me where ever I go. God is not a God who will abandon me, especially in the tough times. If anything, I believe God is with us even more during those times (even if we don't feel it). I know a bunch of great young people who will be traveling to various campuses for one year!!! I know they will do great things for God!!! They remind me a little of me and Mike when we first started out in ministry but i think they do have an advantage of knowing more than we knew at the time. When I dedicated my life to God bout 20 years ago I never imagined my life the way it is. I have no regrets following the Lord. It's definitely been an adventure. But one that I wouldn't trade.. I just want to encourage all those who are following the Lord, making big life changes because of the Lord and/or just questioning. Remember the Lord is with you where ever you go. Hold onto your Faith in Him.. During the valley's you may not "feel" the Lord but believe me He is with you even more during those times. God calls us to have faith as small as a mustard seed. That is all He asks us to have ( faith as small as a mustard seed) and let Him do the rest...

I know this isn't filled with bible verses but i will leave you with one that i have held on for many many years that has gotten me through many things..

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

My Daughter, Faith, asked me to get her this song from itunes which became one of her and my favorite songs. This song has been encouraging me especially the 1st, 3rd and 5th stanzas. The song is titled "What Faith Can Do" by Kutless.. If you have never heard of the song, I have included the video link and the lyrics below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnCEyfRdvDY&feature=channel

"What Faith Can Do by Kutless

Everybody fall sometimes

Gotta find the strength to rise

From the ashes and make a new beginning

Anyone can feel the ache

You think it's more than you can take

But you're stronger, stronger than you know

Don't you give up now

The sun will soon be shinin

You gotta face the clouds

To find the silver lining

I've seen dreams that move the mountains

Hope that doesn't ever end

Even when the sky is falling

I've seen miracles just happen

Silent prayers get answered

Broken hearts become brand new

That's what faith can do

It doesn't matter what you've heard

Impossible is not a word

It's just a reason for someone not try

Everybody's scared to death

When they decide to take that step

Out on the water

It'll be alright

Life is so much more

Than what your eyes are seeing

You will find your way

If you keep believing

I've seen dreams that move the mountains

Hope that doesn't ever end

Even when the sky is falling

I've seen miracles just happen

Broken hearts become brand new

That's what faith can do

Over come the odds

You don't have a chance (That's what faith can do)

When the world says you can't

It'll tell you that you can!

I've seen dreams that move the mountains

Hope that doesn't ever end

Even when the sky is falling

And I've seen miracles just happen

Silent prayers get answered

Broken hearts become brand new

That's what faith can do

That's what faith can do!

Even if you fall sometimes

You will have the strength to rise"

Derek was the last member of the team to arrive in Kansas where we met for 4 days to plan and pray for our travel ministry this year. Everyone that was already there decided to play a prank on him. I dropped off Carl and Sam about 5 miles down the freeway and they pretended to be hitch-hikers. When Derek arrived at the house, I said, “Hey Derek, I need to go to the store to get some things, wanna come along?” So Jessie, Courtney, Yao and I took Derek to the store and on the way we picked up some “hitch-hikers” (Carl and Sam). We made sure they sat to the right and to the left of Derek in the back seat. Carl and Sam acted like they were on some sort of drug and had all these crazies perspectives on life. It was HILARIOUS. It’s not on the clip, but we decided to take these “hitch-hikers” home to give them dinner and it was there that we told Derek it was all a joke!   We got a lot of their acting on film!!  The video was too big to upload onto the website, but you can view it on my blog!  Check it out: < http://www.myleshamby.com/ >

I met Jessica last summer in a Texas Government class at ACC. I offered her a ride home one day after class, and that was how our friendship began. We began studying together a couple times a week. Soon I met her roommates Lily, Pearla, and her sister Joyce. I love all these chicas so much!

Last February, God gave me a dream about Lily. In the dream, there were about 30 Latino students together in a living room, and Lily was leading them as a house church. After I dreamt this, I called Lily right away asking to meet up. We got together and I shared the dream with her and told her God was calling her as a spiritual leader in the Hispanic community. I think she was a little surprised because she didn’t really know God at the time. But this led me and these roommates to start meeting up to read God’s Word and get to know him.

Lily has really gotten to know God over the past few months, and she has a close relationship with Jesus now. She said that she prays to him and trusts him in every life difficulty, and he always comes through! Just last week, Jesus worked an amazing miracle in her life. Her legs were a little bit uneven lengths, and this was causing pain in one of her feet. We prayed in the name of Jesus and her leg grew out so that her legs are even now! Praise God!

Last night Jessica and Lily met up with me, Meghan, and Grace, and we read through John 4. It was so powerful and Lily and Jessica had great insight into the Word. God was really highlighting the distinction between spiritual water and spiritual food in this passage. We must drink the living water, which is being filled with the Spirit (John 7:37-39), but we must also eat the food, which is doing God’s work. Our lives should be a balance between these two things.

We went back to their apartment, and got to drink some living water as we prayed together. Then we got to eat some good food from God when Lily decided to get baptized! She was buried with Jesus and raised up with him! Hallelujah!

Pray for this sister as she moves to College Station this week… Lily, wherever you go, Jesus goes with you!

We live in a church culture that underestimates the value and power of baptism. Every single example you will find in the book of Acts, as soon as someone put their faith in Jesus, they were baptized. Now we have to go through this long process of filling out a “baptism application” form and wait for a date to be baptized by the pastor in a church. Well the only thing on my baptism application form is I have decided to follow Jesus, check! And the authority to baptize? Who has it? Who gives it? This is what Jesus said:

Jesus came and told his disciples, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:18-20

If only the clergy can baptize, then only the clergy can fulfill the Great Commission. If that is the case, we have a serious lack in the number of workers and we all need to get ordained!

This week, some of us from the All Nations and SCPx family helped out at InterCP’s Missions Leadership Training. These young Korean American students are giving up a year of their lives to go live in the Middle East and to share about the straight path to the Kingdom of God through Isa al Masih (Jesus the Messiah). These close friends of mine challenge me every time I am around them because they are so all-or-nothing for Jesus, ready to take up their cross and follow him, and filled with the Father’s deep heart of compassion for the nations. You want to see some mighty prayer take place? Give an InterCP person a map. Praise God for the great work of mobilization that he is doing through this group!

As we shared last week about church planting strategies and the multiplying dna within the seed of the Kingdom of God, we realized that these students had never been released to baptize new believers! Not only that, but many of them had never been baptized themselves. Erik had them go outside immediately to be baptized, and as they dedicated themselves in obedience to God, heaven opened over us!

One of my favorite quotes: “As soon as the works of the Scriptures are taken out of the hands of the common people and put into the hands of trained professionals, a movement ceases to move forward.” – Erik Fish at the Las Vegas Baptisms

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

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A story of Grace!  Part 1

I am a fisherman.   I am a fisherman.  I am a fisher of men!   One of my favorite verses in the Bible comes from when Jesus calls some of his disciples along the shoreline in Matthew 4:19 and says: "Come, follow me, and I will make you fishers of men."
 

Have you ever caught a big fish before? If you have, in my humble opinion, you have just experienced an act of God’s grace!  As an experienced fisherman, I enjoy the challenges of putting the best presentation of bait before my prey, but all the while, I genuinely recognize that I am at the mercy of God and His elements during every fishing adventure.   I’ve fished in the midst of nasty storms  with pelting rain and sand as well as in sunny, warm, and serene ocean tides.  I’ve caught fish in both conditions and am genuinely aware that though I do my best, God is Lord over the beasts of the air and the fish of the sea.  

As you might have just figured out, I am pretty passionate about fishing!  In fact, during a passionate fishing frenzy over 10 years ago, me and my brother SP went on an adventure after Friday night fellowship at RCCC  ( youth group for me, YAF for SP) around midnight but we could not find a bait shop that was open in the wee hours of the morning.  We got duped by one bait shop that advertised in the Fisherman magazine that they were open 24 hours over the weekend.  We ended up sleeping in my Honda Civic overnight waiting for another bait shop to open at 5am in order to fish!  In the morning, we read Psalm 8 and claimed a promise of God’s blessing over us as we went out to conquer the Atlantic ocean from the surf of New Jersey.  I honestly don’t think we caught anything that day, but SP is still my brother from another mother even though he hails from a state 3,000 miles away from NJ!

Matthew 22:37-39 (New International Version)

³⁷Jesus replied:  "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind."^{[a] 38}This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹And the second is like it: "Love your neighbor as yourself."

I suppose there are two major things that I enjoy about fishing that I believe relates to this passage.

First, the encounters with God and His presence through  the sound of  crashing waves and sprays of sea salt mist.   It is a place where my soul readily connects with God.   Deep soul searching conversations with God seem easiest on the beach for me.  Pouring out emotions, feelings, perceptions, to the One who has said that the descendants of Abraham would be like the sand on the shores of the sea!   During some of my early morning fishing adventures, seeing the sun rise above the horizon is an event that has brought joy and refreshment to my soul.  A sunrise reminds me that God’s mercies are new every morning!  During my  night time fishing adventures, seeing the moon and stars in the sky reminds me how small I am, yet how awesome and loving God is!  Honestly, I believe that we all need to find out ways in which we connect deeply with our Creator.  Just like many people search for strong signals for free wireless connections or cell phone reception, we need to seek out places where our souls readily connect with God.   We need to make space in our lives to love God with all of our heart, mind, soul and strength.     How do you connect with God most readily?

Second, I enjoy the kind of love and fellowship that I can share with those with whom I fish.  There is something about fishing that forms our character.  A bond of friendship that is strengthened.   On a recent fishing trip while fishing on a beach in Belmar, NJ, I received some powerful encouragement.  I had arrived on the beach with two of my friends, Yuri and Ken at around 7:00pm.  We spent over 3 hours in conversation with God and one another.   Often, my conversations with people at the beach while fishing are life transforming.    The wind, waves, and sand keep good secrets.

But it is not just about the fishing.  It is also about the journey of life.  On a recent drive back, I experienced a powerful prayer time in the car ride back home with my house mate Ken! In a way, fishing enables me to love my neighbor as myself especially when I catch a big one and can share the goodness of God with my friends and family!

Back to the story!  Well, we were fishing almost 3 hours and the only thing we had caught were two ugly skate fish which kinda look like small sting rays.  Ken and Yuri had the blessing of catching these nasty fish whose wings are sometimes amputated and sold in Chinese food markets for $2.00 a pound!

So in frustration, as the shameful member of the no fish caught club, I took a whole fish, called a bunker and chopped it into three pieces!  I hurled two pieces into the surf as "chum" and then took a hook and placed it thru the mouth and upper lip of the fish going thru its nose.  I cast it into the sea with little faith, much unbelief, and a hint of cynicism.  I then went over to tell my friend Ken, that we should begin to pack it up in a few minutes.  He told me he had one last piece of clam bait and that he wanted to use before we left.  I proceeded to walk over to my rod and then bam!  The rod doubled over and line started screaming off the reel.  I walked  to the left and moved closer to the surf to try and control the fish and prevent it from taking off into some wooden pilings to the right of me.  I could tell it was a big fish by the amount of power and stress it was putting on my rod and reel.  I knew that fish this size know how to throw hooks out of their mouths and swim toward sharp barnacle infested pilings that can cut through almost any fishing line.  Line continued to scream off the reel but I knew the fish would be getting tired soon if I could just keep the line pressure on the fish.   After a more few minutes of fighting the fish, I was able to take in line on the reel and the fish was getting closer and closer to the shore line. I gave the pole to my friend Ken so that he could keep the line tight.  The fish was thrown onto the angled surf with a wave and I then ran over and grabbed the 40 pound test flourocarbon leader line that held the chemically sharpened hook in the fish’s mouth.   I was able to drag the fish up the incline onto the level portion of the beach.

Then Ken’s alarm went off at 10:02pm as I reached into the fish’s mouth to remove the hook embedded in the side of fish’s mouth. At that moment of grace, a sense of great joy filled my spirit as I was reminded of God’s goodness and provision in my life.  The 37 inch wild Striped Bass that I landed helped to feed some of my friends lunch and dinner a few times over!!!  Everyday at 10:02am and 10:02pm, for the last three years, I pray with likeminded kingdom workers to the Lord, for Him to send out workers into the harvest because the harvest is ripe and the laborers are few.  I was acutely reminded of God’s faithfulness and prayed to the Lord of the Harvest to send  out workers!!

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I have some testimonies to share:  Two weekends ago I traveled to Dearborne, MI, where a good friend of mine from college and her husband are serving as missionaries amongst the Muslim populations in the US.  Dearborne is practically all Arab, Arabs from everywhere- Iraqui refugees, Pakistan, Afghanistan, ect.  They have been there a year trying to build relationships with people and share Jesus stories with them, but frustrated at the same time for not seeing the fruit they had been longing to see.  How long does it take and why is there still such a language barrier?  It was so good to be there to encourage them, pray and worship with them and even visit and share with some of their Arab friends.  My drive home, however, was about 5 hours.  I arrive home knowing that something just isn’t right with my Ford Windstar that God blessed me with a few months ago.  I look under to find that my rear axle is broke in half but still attached!  I couldn’t even drive it to the grocery store without getting it fixed and God just had me drive 5 hours going 70mph on i80 with no problems until I got home and  pulled into the driveway.  Can you imagine both my rear wheels buckling in underneath me at that speed?  I was rejoicing in the providence and protection of the Lord and so excited to have Him as my God. 

So I borrowed my wonderful and gracious aunt’s Jeep Cherokee and met  Monday morning with a friend of mine from high school sharing the testimony about my axle, but also the numerous stories of God’s protection and his deliverance with vehicle accidents in situations when I was in  Malawi on missions when they could have been deadly.  Psalm 91:4 “He will shield you with his wing; He will shelter you with his feathers; His faithful promises are your armor and protection.”  It’s a little funny with the timing that after having that sweet conversation and driving to my home in New Wilmington that I’m in a car accident where another vehicle going 45mph hits into my driver’s side ruining both our vehicles.  He ruined our cars, but he never hit me.  He hit low enough and just behind the driver’s seat that I never felt the impact, only the movement of the car.  It was as if by providence God placed me in the sturdiest vehicle I could be traveling in and an unseen hand directing its place of impact on the vehicle protecting me the entire time.  No bruises, no aching, no whiplash, nothing, though my driveshaft was severed.  And then I get an email from my friend Laston all the way in Malawi in Africa, saying that on Monday he was worried for me all day.  He somehow knew I was driving and God had put it on his heart to pray for me all that day.  He runs to the internet cafe in the morning to send me a message and make sure I was alright without me telling him of that day's events.  The Lord Himself covered me with prayer.   And so I continually sit in awe of the faithfulness of my God.  The Jesus who spared me yesterday is the Jesus who continually spares me today and I would drive anywhere with him.  I wouldn’t trust my life with another.